A system and method for controlling the remote starting of a vehicle are provided to determine whether the remote starting is possible by comparing a parking lever operating force measured by a sensor with a reference parking lever operating force corrected in consideration of the durability degradation of a parking system. The method includes sensing a driving distance of the vehicle, operating times of a parking lever, a road inclination, and a parking lever operating force, when the vehicle is parked. Whether the remote starting is possible is determined by comparing a magnitude of the parking lever operating force with a magnitude of a reference parking lever operating force.