A grinding control method and device for a wafer, and a grinding device are provided. A grinder is controlled to grind a mass production wafer with a set grinding parameter. In a case that it is determined to perform a test using a test wafer, the grinder may be controlled to grind the test wafer with the set grinding parameter. A first total thickness variation of the grinded test wafer is acquired by a dedicated measurement device, and an updated grinding parameter is acquired based on the first total thickness variation. The grinder is controlled to grind the mass production wafer with the updated grinding parameter. In this way, a wafer with a uniform thickness can be obtained, thereby improving flatness of the grinded wafer.