The present invention provides a vehicle control apparatus, a vehicle control method, and a vehicle control system capable of optimizing balance between a target tire lateral force and a target tire longitudinal force. A vehicle control apparatus outputs an instruction for achieving an optimal slip ratio corresponding to a minimum value of a sum of a first difference and a second difference to an actuator regarding braking/driving of a vehicle. The first difference is a difference between a tire lateral force and a target tire lateral force with respect to an arbitrary slip ratio in a correlative relationship between a slip ratio and the tire lateral force of a tire of a wheel portion. The second difference is a difference between a tire longitudinal force and a target tire longitudinal force with respect to the arbitrary slip ratio in a correlative relationship between the slip ratio and the tire longitudinal force.