A system which regulates communication with a server is described. During operation, the system determines a retransmission rate of data packets during a first set of conversations between a group of users and the server via a peering link. Next, the system compares the retransmission rate and an historical retransmission rate of data packets during a second set of conversations between a second group of users and the server via the peering link. The system then adjusts a target acceptance rate of the server to requests to initiate conversations with additional users via the peering link based on the comparison of the retransmission rate and the historical retransmission rate. Additionally, the system accepts or rejects a request to initiate a conversation between another user and the server via the peering link based on an actual acceptance rate of the server to requests to initiate the conversations and the target acceptance rate.