A scheme for monitoring node operational status according to communications transmits messages periodically according to a heartbeat rate among the nodes. The messages may be gossip messages containing the status of the other nodes in the pairs, are received at the nodes and indications of the communications delays of the received messages are stored, which are used to compute statistics of the stored communications delays. Parameters of the node status monitoring, which are used for determining operational status of the nodes, are adjusted according to the statistics, which may include adjusting the heartbeat rate, the maximum wait time before a message is considered missed, and/or the maximum number of missed messages, e.g., the sequence number deviation, before the node is considered non-operational (down).