A computer-implemented method for compressing database objects may include 1) identifying a database object within a relational database, 2) determining that the database object meets a compression criterion that is not met by at least one additional database object within the relational database, 3) identifying a location of the database object within a database file of the relational database, and 4) compressing a portion of the database file at the location of the database object without compressing all of the database file. Various other methods, systems, and computer-readable media are also disclosed.